You are not alone

Have you ever felt alone and abandoned by God in your life? It is never a good feeling. I suddenly felt this way yesterday. It just came like a bolt of lightning, and caught me by surprise. I can't say that I was prepared for it. I'm not sure if it's the worries that are weighing on my mind or the uncertainties in my life, not knowing what is ahead of  me, but that feeling was overwhemling. For a very long time now, I felt empty, very empty. I felt like I'm in a vacuum of  darkness and all I can see is nothingness. I'm not sure if I can describe that feeling but it is very dark and black.

I can't remember exactly how I got out of it but I manage to take small baby steps towards recovery, or should I say healing. I realised that too often I have relied on my own strength, such that when I am unable to handle life's difficulties, I crumple... I think my healing process started when I surrendered to God and allowed Him to strengthen me. Truely, I can only rely on God's strength to handle what life throws at me. That process started at mass and every waking moment now, I constantly pray for God's strength to sustain me. Knowing that He is with me, helps me deal with the
challenges of life. There are still moments when I fall back on being reliant on own strength but I keep reminding myself that God is with me. I find that I have to surrender daily to His power to help me in life. This is not easy and I am still in my infancy, trying to find my way. I am confident though, that I will get there with God.

Life may be difficult but God never gives up on us. We need not feel alone because He is right there with us. I can't imagine the pain you are going through but I know that God knows. I do believe that He is healing you right this very moment.

I pray that you will always remember that you are never alone and that God is with you in your pain and emptiness.